Opinion

Tesla Memories & Current News — Dateline February 2032

Before the current news, we wish to take a moment for a nostalgic look back down the road of Tesla Giga Texas history from the perspective of early 2032:

It is hard to remember that when the Giga Texas Complex first began production in 2022, the sole product was a Tesla car. It was called the Model “Y” from the first four Tesla cars whose model designations spelled S3XY.  

It is also hard now to imagine the excitement when Joe Tegtmeyer and Jeff Roberts’s drones captured the first Prime Bot walking out of the factory and running around the Ring Road of factory, through the Bot obstacle course, and then back into the factory for shipment. 

These videos became routine until a newly minted Bot went off course and walked into the Colorado River. Joe just happened to be flying his drone at the time and captured the event for his over-one-million subscribers. Perhaps the best part of his video was the Bot walking back out of the river and returning to the GIGA3-B factory. 

It was later explained by Tesla that the errant trip activated the Bot’s homing program, so it was only natural that he would walk out of the river to return to GIGA3-B since this series of Bots were not programmed to swim as one of their basic skillsets. 

In spite of the fact that no human was injured and the Bot safely returned to the GIGA3-B Factory, the Tesla stock dropped $1,720 a share from the previous high of $16,327.43. A huge cry that Bots were a risk to humanity again arose from Wall Street (Texas). Wall Street (Texas) totally ignored the fact that hundreds of human lives were being saved every year by Tesla Bots performing dangerous tasks that humans previously had to perform. And also there was only one case of a human being killed by a Bot when the floor gave way causing the Bot to fall on a human. That one instance was in the news for days, and will be intently investigated by Congressional committees. Six Tesla Bots will be called to testify, it was announced on GovTube.

Later it was confirmed by Tesla HQ Austin, from the cosmetic appearance of the Bot, that it was scheduled to be part of the new shipment of Bots destined for STARBASE at Boca Chica, and then on to Mars SpaceX City Delta when Earth and Mars are next in proper position. They are scheduled for launch on the now standard fifth generation Starship Wide Body Cosmos Coaster with Bot self-loading configuration. 

Moving back to current, many on Wall Street (NJ) are now forecasting that the current production of two million Bots a year will be increased by 60% with the addition of the new GIGA3-C in Texas. This groundbreaking facility is special in that Tesla claims that this GIGA3-C will be 97% built by Bots, including the newest specialized construction Bot with UV sensors that allow it to work in the dark and under any weather conditions. In spite of these accomplishments, skeptics are claiming that the quality of GIGA3-C Bots would be worse because of the lack of humans contributing to the construction. Also that the fit and finish of these Bots would be visibly worse. 

Tesla Universe enthusiast’s say this is nonsense and pointed to the fact that the Bot-built Tesla vehicles are indistinguishable from the older human-built ones and are just as safe and reliable. This was echoed by Mr. Musk when he recently visited GIGA-ABC Texas. While there he also demonstrated the latest high performance prototype version of the Tesla Plaid Aircraft (EA) that flew him from STARBASE in less that an hour, with only one flying intervention.  

Mr. Musk also acknowledged that he still has not quite regained his “Earth Legs” after his second trip to Mars SpaceX City Alpha. And, he also dispelled the Wall Street (NJ) claims that Tesla is losing money on every Mars City Habitat assembled. SpaceX Mars (SXM) is currently up 23 Doge at market of $8,564 per Doge on the Wall Street (Mars) Exchange. 

It was noted that the newest Austin Boring Loop stop at Wall Street (Texas) was operating smoothly and transporting 70% more people with the addition of the Tesla People/Bot Transporter that operates for 24 hours on the 4680.6 battery. The same battery had also recently been added to the Cybertruck Work Truck for a weeks job site operation without requiring recharging. 

Finally, in wrap-up, it has been noted in the press that Tesla still sees no need for a PR department. But it was emphasized that if there is ever a need for a PR Department, it will be manned by the physical and electronically protected Ceramic Protect (CR) Bots as currently used by Congress for press conferences. 

By Jim Ringold teslacarstuff@gmail.com. All Rights Reserved.





 

Products You May Like

31 Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *